Tuesday, July 15, 2008

mercedes-benz, now and forever

I drive a Mercedes-Benz, so this is going to be a biased post. And while I try my very best not to seem like a hardcore Benz bigot, I really am one, especially when I meet people who have an unreal/uninformed perception of their Hondas or what have you. Don't get me wrong - I respect Japanese cars. In fact, my daily driver is a Japanese car. But don't come to me saying that your ricer is fast, because you and I both know it isn't -- not compared to my Benz.

Anyway, I was delighted to see this post from a fellow Benz enthusiast. To make the long story short, he was driving along SLEX and became the subject of rage of a Honda City driver. Here are some excerpts from his blog (some parts edited for clarity):


"So this is the story of one bigot Honda City owner, who thinks that all Benz owners shouldn't be yielded a right of way. But first, what is a Honda City?

(It) is a compact sedan - a typical Japanese Ricer. Everything in this car is so stupid and backward. The design is totally the opposite of German engineering superiority. Believe me, I would rather take a bus than own (a Honda City).

So going back to this bigot gayf'cker....I'm really convinced that this gayf'cker hates anyone who drives a Mercedes-Benz. The moment I took the lane ahead of him, he kept blowing his Honda-tuned horn. "F'ckhead," I uttered and pushed quickly (to) 80km/h, away from the Sucat traffic jam. I knew he would follow and he actually did. I heard his stupid car squealing in pain as if its power already exceeded the limits.

I pushed to 90km/h and then pulled a sudden drop to 80km/h and let him go ahead. I (wanted) to hear that tin can scream. He then slammed his brakes. This fuckface was no sport. He wanted a rear damage.

(I) brought the drivetrain on third and slingshot from his ass. From the rearview mirror, I saw the desperate chase. I heard the 3000rpm+ sound of this rice cooker, so I pulled in 4th, sunk the pedal. I sensed he was in 5th 'coz the rice cooker was about to get toasted! Going on 100km/h, I pushed on (my Benz's) Holy Fifth Gear. Wham! the f'ckface was smokin'!

For one, that asshole extraordinaire never did his math. (My) 2.3L German engine against (his) 1.3L twisting aluminum China-assembled Japanese-designed engine. (My) 124bhp versus what ... 3o? 40? The only thing I lost was my gas, but so what?"


You didn't hear it from me.


P.S. Comments not allowed. I know how very (very) sensitive some ricers can get :)